I’ve been experiencing quite the burn out lately in all aspects of my life. And I’ve touched on being creatively drained quite a bit on the blog; but when I found myself drifting into this feeling with my personal life, I knew it was time to reflect, make a few changes & of course write about it. My life has changed a lot in the course of the year – with battling grief & coming to terms with the changes of my dad no longer being here & how certain milestones & life has been because of that hurdle. But along side all of this, there has been the usual “new year new me” mindset of setting healthier goals, establishing better routines & focusing on self growth. In general, I want this year to be a time where I really evolve as a person & gain happiness in more authentic ways. In today’s blog post I want to share a few ways I’ve been managing my burnout & actively making changes in my life to better my mind & soul.

Change Your Surroundings

One of our goals for this year is to at least start the process in finding a new home. Whether it’s driving through different towns & new neighborhoods or searching the web, I want to start manifesting a new home for ourselves. For the time being, we have rearranged our furniture in our living room, decluttered a few items & added some new decor to spruce up the place. I’m really loving how the space is more open & appears larger. It’s funny how a simple change such as this really brightened my mood & gave me more motivation. Sometimes although you may be wanting to make a more drastic change like move to a new town, you need to first start with your present location. Ask yourself what would make your space more cozy. For me, decluttering sessions & reorganizing can really make a difference.

Take Social Media Breaks

I’m trying to learn how to be more present. This means spending less time updating my Instagram stories & more time away from my phone. I love documenting my life & sharing my interests online. But I think we all can get caught up in our digital personas. I can’t tell you how much time I waste scrolling through my feeds & other people’s stories. It has gotten out of hand. Ever since I started making the habit of hiding the app or putting my phone down, I’ve found myself being more productive & in a general better mood. Whether I want to admit it or not, I tend to play the comparison game or feeling the pull to constantly update people about my life for validation. And I’d much rather establish a healthier social media mindset where I post for my enjoyment only & allow myself to spend a few days a week unplugged. You don’t have to share every photo or moment of your life. You don’t need to post things right away either. You can practice digital mindfulness. Most importantly, spend time away from technology more often & give yourself a break from that world.

Don’t Forget About Yourself

You can be equally there for others while also prioritizing yourself. It’s not selfish. It’s crucial. Make those doctors appointments, go on that walk, take a nap, eat a balanced diet, reflect on your passions, apply to that job & learn something new. When we put time & energy into ourselves, we can actually be more helpful to others. When we are all one sided, we immediately feel off kilter & that’s when burn out can rear it’s head. I’ve been making small changes of making to-do lists & sticking to them. I no longer push things to the side & say “I’ll get to it when I get to it”. I’m more proactive in my day to day errands & business tasks. And in the process, I’m growing more as an individual. I’d also like to mention, if you need to rest – let yourself fully rest it out. I think we all tend to make ourselves feel guilty to take a break. We confuse this word with laziness & that mindset needs to stop.

Don’t Overfill Your Plate

When I’m creating to-do lists, I try to keep to the saying “I need to get these done, but not all at once.” Sometimes I get lost in the idea that being productive means being very busy, have a packed schedule & no time for anything fun. This is not the way to be. I have actually became more productive & motivated when I slow down & take my time. Even though I take things slow doesn’t mean I’m being lazy. I am teaching myself not to rush & that tasks can be taken care of in a timely manner. As someone who can get overwhelmed & anxious, I have mindfully taught myself to slow down on purpose. I choose a few tasks per day to complete & try not to make them feel like the end of the world. Easier said than done, I’m sure. But I have seen a positive difference in myself with these subtle shifts.

Declutter Your Space

It wouldn’t be a Mind Beauty Simplicity blog post without the discussion of decluttering would it? I strongly believe your space reflects your mind. When my home is disorganized & cluttered, I immediately feel out of control. As a practicing minimalist, I have successfully downsized my life in half. This removal of literal baggage is one of the main factors to my overall well-being. I tend to conduct seasonal decluttering sessions where I take inventory of all aspects of my life: my belongings, my home, my digital space, my social circle & my habits & ask myself “what is no longer serving me?” If you are feeling overwhelmed & burnt out, maybe this would be a perfect moment for you to do the same. And you don’t need to be heroic about it either. Start small & choose one area of your life that may need sorted. I can guarantee this small realignment will make a difference.

Have you been feeling burnt out lately? Let me know which tips you found helpful in the comments. If there are other ways you combat burnout, please feel free to share.

-B

self care

10 Self Care Tips To Combat The Winter Blues

January 16, 2023January 16, 2023 mindbeautysimplicity

Snow is pretty. And I love cozying up in my most comfy sweater & drinking warm beverages. But I’ll admit – the winter season can be rather dull with the shorter / darker days. Not to mention the cold weather has enticed me to hibernate until spring. To make the winter season less depressing, I’ve come up with 10 self care ways to combat those winter blues. They are not extraordinary tips & are probably ones you’ve read before – but I personally find these activities & routines to be very helpful during these cold months. And I hope it inspires you to add a few of these to your own routines.

add ambience & light in & outside your home

After the holidays, people tend to take down their holiday decor whether it’s outdoor lights or your Christmas tree [ if you celebrate ]. I’m not saying you need to keep the holly jolly atmosphere up until March – but I suggest you maybe string some white neutral lights around your apartment, bedroom or home to brighten your surroundings. I’ve noticed during those cold dark nights in the winter, when I have string lights or the fireplace going, I find myself more at ease. Another suggestion would be to simply open your blinds throughout the day & bring in that natural light when you can. And although we may want to save money on our electric bills, it’s important to keep your lights on if you are going about your home. Sitting in the dark can dampen your mood & can actually affect your circadian rhythm.

get outdoors & explore nature

I know what your thinking – it’s too cold to go for walks. But I say, bundle up & get moving even if it’s a few minutes a day. Getting outdoors & breathing in that fresh air is so good for our health. It provides us with a sense of clarity & can actually make us more productive when we return to our usual tasks. I personally love taking walks around the neighborhood or go window shopping at local towns during the winter. And if it’s snowing, at least we have pretty views to admire. When we do get the chance to visit the mountains during this season, I love hiking the local parks & taking in the iced over waterfalls & trudging in the snow.

escape in a good book

When you are looking to relax & shut your mind off I highly recommend getting lost in a book. As you may know, I have became an avid reader once again & love prioritizing a few hours in my evenings to reading a few chapters. Some of my favorite genres to have that proper escapism is fantasy or thrillers. If you are looking for some book recommendations, check out my favorite books & series of 2022.

take a warm shower or bath

For me, I’ve became a shower girl. Some of it has to do with the fact I found a giant spider in my tub a few months ago & I’m still not over it. But I digress. I love taking warm [ borderline hot] showers in the evenings. Sometimes I will literally sit on the floor of the shower & let the water fall on me. The warm water helps me get sleepy & for obvious reasons, warms me up from the frigid temperatures. On nights or weekends I’m able to, I enjoy doing a full self care routine with hair masks, exfoliation, shaving & using a nice smelling body wash. It sounds simple but I always feel so rejuvenated once I’m super clean.

declutter your space

Are we even surprised I mentioned this? I think a good decluttering session is always a good idea especially in winter when we are in our homes more often. When our space is organized chances are it will brighten our moods in the process. Go through your clothing, toiletries & even miscellaneous items. And if you are looking for decluttering inspiration in all areas of your life, browse through my entire decluttering section on the blog.

play videos games or old school board games

If you are looking for a fun activity to do with friends, your significant other or family – board games are a fun way to spend your time. I love going / hosting game nights especially in the winter. We tend to order takeout & just catch up as well. Video games are also a great way to occupy your time whether alone or connected with friends. It’s a great way to connect with friends from a distance. During the pandemic especially, we loved playing Fall Guys & Animal Crossing. I’ve even considered re-purchasing The Sims as it was a favorite of mine back in the day. These activities are nice ways to unwind & relax after long days.

start a blog or get to writing

This is a rather specific idea & one that has been a great hobby. I think if you are looking for a way to express yourself creativity or feel connected to other fellow writers, starting a blog is a wonderful option. I started my blog during the pandemic in 2020. I have always had a passion for writing & I love how blogging allows creative freedom. It’s a wonderful outlet for those who are interested. If you don’t necessarily want to write publicly, you can always opt to start a journal of some kind. For instance, I kept a gratitude journal in the past & it was a fun way to practice positive psychology & develop more grateful outlook of life. Especially if the winter season brings on seasonal depression or a general sadness for whatever reason – writing down your thoughts & getting them out of your head is a healthy form of expression.

deep clean your home

Cleaning your home isn’t just a spring time routine. I think the winter time is a great season to really cleanse your home & organize it. Not only does a clean home improves your mood, it can also be a healthy & productive distraction when you are having an off day or have a lot on your mind. And since we are in our homes a lot more during the colder months, we tend to analyze & take in our surroundings a lot harder.

enjoy a winter activity

Sometimes if we are ones to dislike the cold weather, it’s important to consider a different perspective & find ways to enjoy it. There are tons of fun winter activities to choose from including iceskating, skiing or tubing, weekend escape to a cabin [ bonus points if it snows] or shopping around town [ which isn’t winter specific].

book a warmer destination

If you are someone who really dislikes the winter weather, why not just book a trip to a warmer climate? I’m sure there are places you would love to visit & I think this time of year it’s a great time to take some time off, get a tan & soak up that sunshine. I few places I would love to visit at some point is The Caribbean, Greece or California again.

The key to combat the winter blues is to find simple [ or somewhat extravagant] ways to make it better. Outside the travel suggestion, a lot of these are rather easy ways to incorporate in our routines. And to those who absolutely thrive in the winter season, definitely comment down below some of your suggestions.

Stay warm!

-B

Collaberations, organization

Post-Breakup Decluttering: What to Toss After a Relationship Ends

March 28, 2022March 28, 2022 mindbeautysimplicity

There are the gifts—from birthdays, holidays, or those random “just because” days. That t-shirt of theirs you like to sleep in. The toiletries they kept at your place for nights they stayed over. Photos—both physical and on your phone. There’s a paper trail; a collection of love letters, ticket stubs from the concerts you went to, birthday cards. We amass a great deal of stuff over the course of a relationship. But what happens when it ends? How do you declutter after a breakup?

Before I go further, though, thanks so much to Bee for having me here! I’m Katie, but you might know me as the dating b. I write a lifestyle and relationship blog called The Dating B*tch. Don’t let the name fool you, though! My main focus is on helping people improve all aspects of their relationships—including the one they have with themselves.

After a breakup, your relationship with yourself can take a major hit. It’s important to take care of your physical and emotional wellbeing. Part of that self-care can come in the form of decluttering. So, today, I’m sharing my advice on decluttering after a breakup.

Related Read: 7 Ways to Deal with a Breakup

Why You Should Declutter After a Breakup

Even if you’re not a minimalist, it’s a good idea to do a little decluttering sesh if you’re going through a breakup. Here are 3 reasons why a post-breakup cleanse is so important:

1. It Gives You a Sense of Control

Breakups can really leave people feeling anxious and uncertain. Unless you were the one who ended the relationship, you probably didn’t want to break up. It was completely out of your control. That’s a hard thing to deal with. We like to be in control of our own lives and futures, especially when it comes to love and romance. But, if someone ends a relationship you wanted to stay in, that decision was out of your hands. Being broken up with is a passive activity.

The act of decluttering on the other hand, is active. So, by doing a little post-breakup cleaning, you’re putting yourself back in the driver’s seat of your life.

2. It’s Empowering & Proactive

Taking an active approach to your own healing journey can help you feel more empowered. When you go through a breakup, it’s normal to want to stay in bed and wallow. You know you need to work on “self-care” and “healing” and “moving forward,” but heartbreak can make anyone a procrastinator. While you may not be ready to start an exercise routine or get back into the dating field, you can probably do a little decluttering. Doing that will help you feel more productive which can help you heal faster.

3. It Can Help Your Mental Health

Your physical space is strongly tied to your mental and emotional health. If you have a lot of clutter, you tend to feel more disorganized. By getting rid of some of your relationship clutter, and possibly doing some light cleaning while you’re at it, it will help you feel happier and less anxious.

Steps for Decluttering After a Breakup

When you hear the phrase “post-breakup decluttering,” I bet you’ve got an image of burning everything your ex ever gave you. But that’s not how you should approach it. Here’s what to do instead:

1. Get Rid of the Paper Trail

I’m not talking about the love letters or the sentimental ticket stubs you kept. Rather, the electronic paper trail. The hundreds of text messages and photos you’ve got saved on your phone. Now, I totally understand wanting to hold on to the pictures; they’re a part of your life and history, and one day you may want to look at them again. So, for that, go ahead and send them to your Google Drive. But you need to delete the texting chain and all the pictures on your phone. What you don’t need is a way of re-examining everything to see if you can determine what went wrong, which is what you’ll want to do if you can re-read all their old texts.

2. Sort Through the “Stuff”

For me, clearing out my phone was always the hardest part. The next part is way easier. Sort through all the physical stuff. In one pile, you can put their things; their toothbrush, deodorant, the extra clothes they left at your place. Anything that was strictly theirs. Next, the sentimental stuff; letters, the t-shirt you sleep in, the framed photos, the keepsakes from dates or vacations. And finally, the gifts they’ve gotten you.

3. Toss What You Don’t Need

This is going to be subjective, and if there’s nothing you feel you can actually throw away, don’t worry. You don’t have to. But if there’s anything you can get rid of (think, their spare toothbrush that they probably won’t want back), this is where you throw it out.

4. Box Up the Rest

Everything else can be boxed up. If there’s anything you ex will want or need back, put that together in a separate box. Eventually, you’ll need to return it to them, but for now, just pack it up. The rest of the stuff, the gifts and sentimental items, should also be packed up. Again, you don’t need to physically get rid of everything, but you do need to put it where you won’t see it on a daily basis.

5. Celebrate Yourself

Whether you did a lot of cleaning and organizing or just threw a few things together in an afternoon, it’s not easy to declutter after a breakup. It’s a symbolic act of moving forward so take a minute to celebrate yourself for taking that first step.
Thanks again to Bee for letting me write this guest post! For more on dating, relationships, and personal growth, check out my blog at www.datingbitch.com.