organization, Self Growth

5 Reasons Letting Go Is So Damn Difficult!

Wanting a more simple life starts with letting go of what no longer serves us. Easier said than done am I right? I feel like I say this, but always end up saving tons of questionable items. Why is it so hard to let go in the first place? I wish I could just turn my feelings off for one second.

Recently, I helped my husband downsize his childhood belongings from six large storage containers to only one. It was quite the project but one we both knew was something to tackle. It got me thinking about why we hold onto certain things & also why it can be so hard to finally let go. It’s almost like the longer you own something, you start to believe whatever that something is, must be special & worth holding onto. And we discovered even though he forgot most of what was in these containers, the memories started flooding back. And this is why sentimental item can be the MOST difficult to let go. But any type of belongings, if we place too much meaning on said item can become difficult to throw away. Here are 5 reasons why letting go can be so damn difficult.

You Are Still Living in the Past

Nostalgia can be a precious thing. Whether it’s a smell, an object or even a single thought , these things tie us to what we once were. We almost hold onto things for the sole purpose of trying to preserve our memories.

Especially with physical objects, we almost keep these things with the fear of forgetting. We must remember the most powerful aspect of our memories are ourselves. We must let go of said fear & trust we will remember things in our minds. Again, don’t let your objects hold so much credit. You are far more than what you own.

I don’t know if anyone else feels this way, but sentimental items are very difficult for me to declutter. I have been biting the bullet though & challenging myself to go through these items brutally. And through this process, I’ve learned a lot about myself & the things I hold near & dear to my heart. In my 5 Things To Keep In Mind When Decluttering Sentimental Items, I pinpointed key factors that helped me downsize my keepsakes in half!

I felt like I was holding onto too many past memories that ultimately made me feel stuck & less likely to move forward in my life. Although I still have plenty of sentimental items to look back on & cherish, I allowed myself to be rid of the pointless emotional baggage that was taking up space in my home. You need to remember life is constantly moving & you will have far more memories & keepsakes ahead. Make room for the future by narrowing down your past.

You Feel Guilty Giving It Up

Maybe you have a pit in your stomach for purchasing something so expensive you never use. Or perhaps you were gifted something & although the gesture is always sweet, you just don’t use it. These feelings of guilt should not become a burden to your mind.

If you feel guilty over whether you should get rid of something, you should always be rid of that item. That mental turmoil will only make matters worse. I always believe it is better to let go of something you don’t use so it can be treasured by someone else.

And if you are having difficulty letting go an item because it was either passed down to you by a family member or given to you as a gift, ideally the person shouldn’t be upset if you no longer want something. Either return it to the sender or give it to someone who would better appreciate it. Material items should rarely have such pressures of value. And if they do hold lots of value, finds ways to use it or display it. Otherwise, let it go.

Fear of Needing it in the Future

This concept reminds me of everyone buying tons of toilet paper in the beginning of the pandemic. Fear & consumerism when tied together, create chaos. You can’t go walking around with the mindset of the world is ending or “I’ll never be able to find this again.” That’s when hoarding develops. And we really don’t want that. In today’s world, it is rather easy to find certain items online. If at any point you are missing an item or need it again, you can always repurchase it later.

This is why when shopping I don’t purchase just incase items or bulk items. To me, it just seems like a waste of space, money & product. Save some for the rest of us please. I think a lot of people have this notion that if you hold onto something for those just in case moments, it saves them money in the long run. I have noticed this is a wrong way of thinking.

Rarely do I feel grateful for having kept certain things for those just in case items. For example, I’ve had this Christmas sweater I wore one time but have held onto it JUST IN CASE we have an ugly christmas sweater party to go to. The future is always questionable & who truly new we wouldn’t be having large get togethers with friends for a year. By the time we actually have a party, I’m going to want a brand new outfit!

What Will People Think?

Repeat after me, stop caring what people think of you! If a person truly cares if you get rid of something, maybe you should gift it to them. This is your life to live so if you feel overwhelmed by the clutter in your home, don’t waste anymore time.

I’ll be honest, I probably still own plenty of things other people told us we HAD to have when owning a home. But slowly I will even downsize these items because most MUST HAVE items are useless in my opinion. And if there comes a time we truly need something, we will buy it. Simple as that.

It Hints You Were Wrong

Whatever it may be, it’s ok to admit it wasn’t right & it’s healthy to finally let it go. Life is too short to be living with things & people that don’t serve you. And if anything else, these wrongdoings can be seen as lessons leading us to our correct path.

Admitting you were wrong about something can be a hard pill to swallow. But it’s also extremely human & liberating. Maybe you were wrong about a certain style of clothing working for you. Or in a more deep sense, maybe a certain person in your life is wrong for you. These mistakes & lessons are normal & a part of life.

I truly hope these tips help you have more clarity with the idea of having a clutter free life. Comment down below what holds you back from letting go.

-B

blogtober, blogtober, Minimalism, Minimalism

My Fall Capsule Wardrobe

What is a capsule wardrobe exactly? Minimalists like to define it as a set number of clothing items to reduce the troubles of decision fatigue & allows us to understand the benefits behind owning less. Courtney Carver, the writer behind the book, Project 333 goes a step further & challenges those to have 33 items of clothing for 3 months. I attempted project 333 for myself during the pandemic & I did take note of the benefits. But overall, I don’t necessarily like to limit myself to a set number of clothing pieces. I simply ask myself how often I wear something? Does it fit the person I wish to be? And is it practical? Otherwise, I let it go. And over the course of the summer, I’ve downsized my wardrobe extremely to the point where 95% of my clothing is gone! As the new season approaches, I look forward to revamping my style & curating a capsule wardrobe that allows me to create classic outfits.

As I’ve decluttered over 10 bags of clothing in the past few months, I’ve also made a few replacements along the way. I’ve been in a style rut & wanted to enter my fall season with a bit more style. Summer tends to put myself in a style rut [ especially when it’s hot ] because all I wear are athletic shorts & basic tanks or tees. Fall fashion is elite. And I’m so excited to share the pieces I’ve bought & put together.

Denim Denim Denim

A classic pair of jeans is a staple in any wardrobe. As a millennial, I still find skinny jeans to be the most flattering at times, but I have been wanting to branch out to different styles. I purchased a pair of the viral 90’s straight leg relaxed fit jeans from Abrocrombie. And I totally understand the hype! I can’t wait to rock these with some sneakers & basic tees all fall season.

Business Beige

To jazz up your dressier occasions, why not swap or add a pair of beige slacks to your wardrobe along with the typical grey or black. I personally love incorporating lighter shades to my fall wardrobe to showcase a brighter look. No white after Labor Day, who? I also love adding knits to make your look a bit more casual.

Stick To The Basics

The majority of my closet is filled with basic tees & tanks. Lately – I’ve added a few fitted crop tops to my wardrobe. I love pairing tighter tops with baggier pants to create a bit of definition. I love layering these with flannels, cardigans or jackets to stay warm. I recommend you have a basic white, black & grey t-shirt & tank & then go from there. Stick to shades that are the most flattering to you. There’s no need to own the entire rainbow.

Sneakers

I’m trying to get away from just living in Uggs until March (although if you are from the East Coast, it’s pretty much inevitable). Last fall, I purchased this pair of Sam Edelman sneakers in this white & beige shade. I thought they would be a perfect minimalistic look to any pair of jeans or leggings.

Birkenstocks

It’s hilarious to me Birkenstock clogs are back in style. I wore these almost daily in high school. I haven’t yet purchased these, but am looking to add these to my capsule wardrobe soon to add variety to my shoe collection. I feel like they would be perfect paired with my A&F jeans.

Dainty Statement Jewelry

I strongly believe you can enhance an outfit by just adding a few statement jewelry pieces. I love pairing my rose gold B&T necklace with a crop top & jeans or adding a pair of gold hoops.

Oversized Sweaters & Cardigans

Of course, it’s not fall without that cozy sweater weather feeling. I love pairing them with black leggings, a warm beverage & a book in hand. They are like warm hugs! For the most part, I prefer neutral shades like beige, grey or black , but I also love wearing Halloween themed jumpers to be festive.

Water Proof Boots

On the east coast, I feel like it’s crucial to own boots that are weather resistant. Whether it’s walking through the pumpkin patch or the muddy Renaissance fair, I’m so glad to have boots that will be easy to clean. During the Nordstrom anniversary sale, I purchased a pair of black water proof ankle boots & I have a strong feeling I’ll be wearing these a lot this fall season!

Graphic Tees

During my recent declutter, I let go of a ton of old graphic t-shirts that were faded or had holds in them. I still believe we don’t need to own an entire drawer filled with graphic tees, but I do think it’s fun to own a few to make an outfit more unique. One of my favorites is my zodiac sign flower t-shirt.

Even More Inspiration

Pinterest is my favorite site for finding fashion inspiration. Here are a few photos that depict the style I’m going for lately…

pin it for later
pin it for later
pin it for later

What clothing styles / pieces are you looking forward to wear this season?

-B

Minimalism, organization

30 Items You Don’t Need In Your Wardrobe

Out of all the places in my home, my closet & dresser drawers are spaces I declutter most frequently. Although I’m more of an intentional person, I do love fashion & trying out different styles ever so often. With that, I tend to accumulate quite a few clothing pieces throughout the year. I no longer have the mindset of having a certain number of items in my wardrobe, but I’ve discovered types of items you definitely truly don’t need in your closet. I’ve shared a shorter list in the past on my blog, so check out that post here if you are interested. But today, I’ll be sharing with you 30 items you don’t need in your wardrobe. Yes, 30!

You Might Also Like: Listen up! You Don’t Need These Items In Your Wardrobe

1. Items That Don’t Make You Feel Confident

Life is too short to own clothing that doesn’t make you feel your best – get rid of them!

2. Items That No Longer Fit Your Present Body Type

I get it – sometimes you want to save those jeans you swear you’ll fit back into. Or on the opposite token, you save those pieces for those times you think you may need to up a size. Unless you are saving maternity clothing because you plan to have another baby soon, I don’t think it’s fair to yourself to be playing such mind games to your body. Keep what works for your present body type & leave it at that.

3. Damaged, Torn or Stained Items

As I’m writing this, I’m wearing an old t-shirt with a hole in the arm pit so it’s a reminder to myself & my readers to think twice in keeping clothing pieces of this nature. You deserve fresh ones.

4. Items That No Longer Represent Your Current Self

As we grow & evolve, so does our style sometimes. Honor those changes with regular clear outs. Say goodbye to your past self & styles.

5. Items You Are Saving For Your Future Self

In the same token, sometimes we save items for our future selves. Now, I do find this helpful in some cases, but it can also get out of hand & take up space in our closets. So, really ask yourself why you are keeping said item.

6. Items / Gifts Others Have Given You That Are of No Use To You

As appreciative as it is, sometimes gifts [ especially clothing ] from other people don’t represent ourselves. It’s ok to get rid of any of these items especially if you 100% plan not to wear them ever. What do people say, “one person’s trash is another person’s treasure.”

7. Items That Hold A Memory But You Never Wear

Either place the item in a sentimental keepsake box or get rid of it. The item is never the actual memory.

8. Trendy Items You Just Don’t Wear Or Aren’t Practical

I personally, love to stick with classic & timeless clothing pieces, but sometimes the trends get the best of me. Anything you see you are done wearing, get rid of them.

9. Colors of Items You Just Don’t Wear

I used to think I had to own every color of the rainbow & color coordinate my closet accordingly. I no longer have this mindset. If I don’t like the color yellow on me, you won’t see me in anything yellow. Period.

10. Items That Aren’t Comfortable

Whether it’s an itchy sweater, tight pants or tops, shoes you can’t walk in – yea, get rid of those items.

11. Items You Spent Tons of Money On But Don’t Wear

I know you may feel guilty for spending a certain amount of money on something, but it actually feels worse when you just let the item sit in your closet with the tags still on.

12. Outfits You Wore Once & Won’t Wear Again

Those dresses you wore to a wedding or anything you wore literally one time & will never wear again. Yea, let those pieces go to a better home.

13. Duplicates You Don’t Wear

There are some moments where having duplicates is nice in a wardrobe – like if you have a favorite sweater & want it in multiple colors. But I try to be careful with this, because it’s a fast way to feel like you have no variety in your wardrobe.

14. Clothing Pieces That Remind You of Sad Times

There’s no sense to hold onto physical baggage. Believe it or not, these material items like clothing can actually mentally cause us to hold ourselves back from moving forward.

15. Shoes That No Longer Fit

This goes along with #10 about being comfortable. There’s no sense in owning shoes that are impossible to walk in. I don’t care how pretty they are!

16. Graphic Shirts You’ve Retired To Your PJ Drawer

It’s good to give your old t-shirts a second life. But I try not to overdue this because it can quickly result in an overflowed drawer filled with shirts.

17. Robes You Never Wear

I’m not the biggest fan of robes. I just don’t really understand the point. But I think owning one is efficient if it’s your thing. Otherwise, it seems a bit excessive.

18. Slippers You Never Wear

Again, owning multiple pairs of slippers seems excessive. So, be sure you are wearing all of them on rotation or go through the collection.

19. Holiday Attire You Won’t Wear Next Year

I try to find holiday shirts that I know I’ll wear multiple years in a row. But the truth is, especially around Christmas, I always end up with tons of holiday shirts. It’s a good time for you to go through these items & get rid of ones you know you won’t wear again.

20. Socks With Holes In Them

This goes with #3 but I know [ me included] it can be easy to keep those socks with holes because it’s so easy to accumulate so many! They usually get mixed in the group & I don’t realize there’s a hole until I’m half way out the door!

21. Items You Know Someone Else Could Love

It’s better to give items you aren’t using to those who will love it even more!

22. Items That Need Fixed But Haven’t Been

Those coats that need a new zipper or those tops that are missing a button. If you haven’t yet gotten those fixed, I honestly doubt you ever will.

23. Brands You No Longer Want to Support

Whether you are trying to be more sustainable or you find a companies’ message not up to par with your morals, maybe it’s time to donate those brands & start fresh with ones that are.

24. White T-Shirts That Are No Longer White

I always like to replace my white t-shirts every season or so. Owning white t-shirts that have lost its crisp shade just aren’t fresh to wear.

25. Cheap Accessories

I try not to purchase cheaper jewelry because they usually turn my skin green or they break so easily. It’s worth investing in a few nice pieces of jewelry.

26. Belts You Don’t Use

I’m not the biggest belt person, but I feel like it’s easy to accumulate this accessory. I like to say owning a black, brown & one other shade [ possibly one with some sparkle or buckle ] are plenty for your essential wardrobe.

27. Hats You Don’t Wear

Same mindset as the belts – it’s better to have hats you definitely wear. I like to have at least one knit hat for winter time, a ball cap & a sunhat for the beach.

28. Bras or Undergarments You No Longer Like

You should only keep bras & undergarments that are flattering to you, comfortable & make you feel confident. Everything else should go. Period.

29. Clothing That Has Lots of Years On It

I’m guilty of holding onto some items for longer than expected. For example, I have a bag that is over 10 years old & has a small hole at the bottom. Maybe it’s time to replace it?

30. Items Other People Like on You, But You Don’t

It’s nice to wear certain pieces others may like on you, like a romantic partner for example. But you don’t want this to get out of hand. You want to dress for you & no one else at the end of the day. It’s called your closet for a reason.

Conclusion:

I hope this list provides the decluttering inspiration you may need to cull a proper capsule wardrobe of items you absolutely love!

-B