Tag: self esteem

Self Growth

Feeling Burnt Out? | 5 Mindset Shifts To Consider

mindbeautysimplicity

I’ve been experiencing quite the burn out lately in all aspects of my life. And I’ve touched on being creatively drained quite a bit on the blog; but when I found myself drifting into this feeling with my personal life, I knew it was time to reflect, make a few changes & of course write about it. My life has changed a lot in the course of the year – with battling grief & coming to terms with the changes of my dad no longer being here & how certain milestones & life has been because of that hurdle. But along side all of this, there has been the usual “new year new me” mindset of setting healthier goals, establishing better routines & focusing on self growth. In general, I want this year to be a time where I really evolve as a person & gain happiness in more authentic ways. In today’s blog post I want to share a few ways I’ve been managing my burnout & actively making changes in my life to better my mind & soul.

Change Your Surroundings

One of our goals for this year is to at least start the process in finding a new home. Whether it’s driving through different towns & new neighborhoods or searching the web, I want to start manifesting a new home for ourselves. For the time being, we have rearranged our furniture in our living room, decluttered a few items & added some new decor to spruce up the place. I’m really loving how the space is more open & appears larger. It’s funny how a simple change such as this really brightened my mood & gave me more motivation. Sometimes although you may be wanting to make a more drastic change like move to a new town, you need to first start with your present location. Ask yourself what would make your space more cozy. For me, decluttering sessions & reorganizing can really make a difference.

Take Social Media Breaks

I’m trying to learn how to be more present. This means spending less time updating my Instagram stories & more time away from my phone. I love documenting my life & sharing my interests online. But I think we all can get caught up in our digital personas. I can’t tell you how much time I waste scrolling through my feeds & other people’s stories. It has gotten out of hand. Ever since I started making the habit of hiding the app or putting my phone down, I’ve found myself being more productive & in a general better mood. Whether I want to admit it or not, I tend to play the comparison game or feeling the pull to constantly update people about my life for validation. And I’d much rather establish a healthier social media mindset where I post for my enjoyment only & allow myself to spend a few days a week unplugged. You don’t have to share every photo or moment of your life. You don’t need to post things right away either. You can practice digital mindfulness. Most importantly, spend time away from technology more often & give yourself a break from that world.

Don’t Forget About Yourself

You can be equally there for others while also prioritizing yourself. It’s not selfish. It’s crucial. Make those doctors appointments, go on that walk, take a nap, eat a balanced diet, reflect on your passions, apply to that job & learn something new. When we put time & energy into ourselves, we can actually be more helpful to others. When we are all one sided, we immediately feel off kilter & that’s when burn out can rear it’s head. I’ve been making small changes of making to-do lists & sticking to them. I no longer push things to the side & say “I’ll get to it when I get to it”. I’m more proactive in my day to day errands & business tasks. And in the process, I’m growing more as an individual. I’d also like to mention, if you need to rest – let yourself fully rest it out. I think we all tend to make ourselves feel guilty to take a break. We confuse this word with laziness & that mindset needs to stop.

Don’t Overfill Your Plate

When I’m creating to-do lists, I try to keep to the saying “I need to get these done, but not all at once.” Sometimes I get lost in the idea that being productive means being very busy, have a packed schedule & no time for anything fun. This is not the way to be. I have actually became more productive & motivated when I slow down & take my time. Even though I take things slow doesn’t mean I’m being lazy. I am teaching myself not to rush & that tasks can be taken care of in a timely manner. As someone who can get overwhelmed & anxious, I have mindfully taught myself to slow down on purpose. I choose a few tasks per day to complete & try not to make them feel like the end of the world. Easier said than done, I’m sure. But I have seen a positive difference in myself with these subtle shifts.

Declutter Your Space

It wouldn’t be a Mind Beauty Simplicity blog post without the discussion of decluttering would it? I strongly believe your space reflects your mind. When my home is disorganized & cluttered, I immediately feel out of control. As a practicing minimalist, I have successfully downsized my life in half. This removal of literal baggage is one of the main factors to my overall well-being. I tend to conduct seasonal decluttering sessions where I take inventory of all aspects of my life: my belongings, my home, my digital space, my social circle & my habits & ask myself “what is no longer serving me?” If you are feeling overwhelmed & burnt out, maybe this would be a perfect moment for you to do the same. And you don’t need to be heroic about it either. Start small & choose one area of your life that may need sorted. I can guarantee this small realignment will make a difference.

Have you been feeling burnt out lately? Let me know which tips you found helpful in the comments. If there are other ways you combat burnout, please feel free to share.

-B

advice, Self Growth

What Truly Makes You Happy?

mindbeautysimplicity

A sequential glide of a pen. The musical sound of fingers tapping one key after the other. Thoughts racing as the words spill out on the page. To me, this is paradise.

I have a book recommendation for you all. The Path Made Clear by Oprah Winfrey. I stumbled upon this book a few years ago & it changed my perspective on life. We humans feel almost guilty when feeling lost or not knowing which path is the correct one to take. You’ll get recommendations from all sides & although advice can be helpful, I find the best way to really find your way is to soul search & dive deep into what makes you, you.

Take ownership of your strengths, your short comings, what you’ve loved in the past & what you love now. Truly ask yourself, “What Makes Me Happy?”

You know what makes me happy?

Writing.

Looking back, my whole life I’ve loved the craft. I would keep journals of my thoughts, hopes & dreams for so many years.

I wrote short stories at 7 years old. I made children’s books out of construction paper & sold them to my neighbors. My one neighbor still has one of my “books” to this day.

As a little girl, I wanted to be like Harriet from Harriet the Spy & write down everything. As I got older, I dreamed of becoming a journalist & tv reporter. I was nosy, loved drama & always wanted to find out the scoop on everything. Every chance I took whether it was for fun or my high school newspaper, I was always writing. But unfortunately, like many of us do, I listened too hard to other people.

They would tell me newspapers were a dying bread & you can’t make lots of money doing that. Or they would tell me journalists were too saturated & I wouldn’t be unique enough. I became hard on myself, not thinking I would be good enough. So I changed my path.

And the path I chose isn’t terrible. I’m still proud of my accomplishments. It’s just funny how writing always seems to come back to my life in some form. My Nana used to call me the future Barbara Walters. 😊

Since I listened to others more than myself, I spent my college years learning about the human mind & personalities. Although I found it interesting, I always felt like something was off. One semester I decided to take one writing course, & ended up being referred to the college newspaper the following semester.

And guess what? I loved it!

Clearly, I’ve been oblivious to my calling. I brush it off as something I can do well, I guess? But always went with plans b, c & d.

It wasn’t until I read this passage in Oprah’s book that everything just clicked. It was in that moment I was like “yes, this is me.”

When it comes to your life, you have to find what makes you light up. Sure, I’m not saying you won’t find a career that pays bills well. Or maybe you like doing something as merely a hobby. I believe people can have multiple paths.

It’s so very important to not lose your passions. Passions are what make us stand out from the crowd. And although people might not see the vision, as long as you do, that’s all that should matter.

Take yourself back to when you were really young & people would ask you, “what do you want to be when you grow up?” Before society tainted your outlook on the world, what was it?

Yes I dreamed of being a journalist. But I also wanted to be an artist, a teacher for a while & an actress.

Clearly, I have a very creative soul. And I try to engage those traits through other ways. No, I may not have an abundance of acrylic paint & paint brushes, but I do have makeup brushes & I find my makeup routine to be an art in itself. I also love decorating the house & design in general.

These are the attributes that make me who I am. And I wouldn’t give that up for anything. As long as you enrich yourself in activities that feed the soul, happiness can be just around the corner.

My path led me to writing once again this year through blogging. The combination of sheer boredom [especially during stay at home order] & having the time, I decided why not write? I remember laying awake at night & wondering what I would do to fill my time. And the idea came to me like a freight train. I’ve considered it in the past but my insecurities always seemed to bite me in the ass. “What would people think?” “I’ll be made fun of.”

I don’t know if it’s my age or what, but I just don’t care what people think of me anymore. If it makes me happy, I’m going to do it.

And so, I shall write. I shall write until my hands are sore, because it’s one of the things I love.

And sure, I may not be the next Barbara Walters. But I’m B, & I think she’s pretty cool.

– B 🌿💕

🥰
Self Growth

Stop Caring About What People Think of You

mindbeautysimplicity

“You’ll Never Be Happy If You Constantly Worry What Other’s Think of You”

But why do we let ourselves get caught up in this game & allow it to take control of our lives? We scroll through social media & slowly degrade ourselves with every flick of the finger as the news feed moves across the screen. We treat the comment threats & mentions as true indications of our worth. When we make decisions of our life paths, we can’t help but wonder what others around us are doing instead & what they may think of ours. We question who is in the wrong & who is on the right track.

In terms of starting this passion project of a blog, I’m actually surprised I was able to start it in the first place. I had this fear of vulnerability & putting myself out there, especially to complete strangers across the globe. I wanted to grow thicker skin. All of my scarcities stemmed from caring what people would think of me. I would get a pit in my stomach going through scenarios in my head of being embarrassed or ridiculed for my choices. I though people in my real life would think I was nuts fo even thinking of going down this path.

“I wanted to grow thicker skin”

The fear of judgement is a real problem. It’s so easy to tell ourselves, “don’t worry about what people think of you.” But I know first hand, when I’d click publish on a blog post, my stomach would do flips because I was worried my perspectives on whatever I wrote about would be thought of as a weird or people would criticize my writing style. I’m a rather self critical person. A perfectionist of the arts if you will. On one hand, constructive criticism can be very beneficial to someone’s growth. I had to grasp the idea that there’s a difference between being taught vs. judged.

Here are 5 Ways To Stop Caring What People Think of You:

Have Something To Care About More

Life is all about how you see it & your perspective on situations. Creating a new mindset & shifting it to something more important to you, is a wonderful way to put the focus back on yourself instead of someone else. I think we can overly focus on other people & neglect our own journey’s. And chances are, people aren’t thinking about you on the level you think they are. Most of what you feel are insecurities you’ve developed in your mind. I was always told if I just simply made my life more important & stayed busy, I wouldn’t have time to even care about what other people may think of me or compare my life to there’s.

Question Your Thoughts

When you start caring what people think of you, chances are there’s an underlying reason behind it. Do a bit of reflection & determine why you are feeling the way you are. I for instance can be an over thinker at times. Blame my anxiety I guess. Over the years, I’ve learned to sit with my thoughts & pinpoint my reasonings for getting hung up on something or someone. Write out your thoughts on paper or even talk to a trustworthy person in your life. Most of the time what we think about are merely fabrications of what is really going on.

Find The Right Community

Don’t allow yourself to get mixed in with the wrong crowds. Being around the wrong people who don’t support your goals & ideas can cause you to question your entire existence. You start to wonder who is doing life correctly. You start to lose your authenticity & begin to mold into these so called “experts” on life. Instead, find people who cheer you on.

Embrace Vulnerability

If there are people in your life who question you on how open you are whether it’s in your writing or anything else, they are probably jealous you had the guts to share that information. So instead, feel proud the next time you show vulnerability & open up. I think the more you do this, the stronger you become. Your skin becomes thicker than ever & no sticks or stones could ever break it. In terms of blogging, when I shared my story on anxiety, I was a bundle of nerves at first. Once I read the comments & saw how it helped so many of you, I felt proud. And I want to share more stories on the caliber.

Be Your Own Best Friend

Above all else, YOU are your biggest cheerleader. The reality is, you will always have people questioning your decisions & making unsolicited judgments. It’s up to you to gain that back bone & confidence in your personal journey. There isn’t a rule book on life. There isn’t anyone who is more right than anyone else. So, just do you.

-B

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